Six months ago, I started a new job in a Real Estate Industry under the management of a Senior Executive with strong, dominant personality. Although this attribute is expected from a top-ranked leader, I was feeling like in a constant battle dealing with him. His four-walled office has been our battleground where our ideas and thoughts clashed vehemently. Most often, I always insist mine.
Such strong personality agitates me for I possess them too. Only difference, the big difference rather is I AM STILL SOUR and UNREADY. Does a very feisty mid-management millennial with less experience but think she’s a know-it-all GI needless of any direction from an experienced commander sound familiar to you?
He is armored with vigorous experience and shield with cogent knowledge I don’t want to concede. Until such time, I was maimed by him almost had no chance of surviving the mental combat. It took me a while to realise my stratagem was defective. With humility, I surrendered.
Today, we are now on truce and each day I work industriously on becoming his greatest ally. Here’s how I did it:
1. Listen first. As millennial, we normally have tendencies cutting off a conversation because we want to say something precipitously. Listen intently for listening is the key to all effective communication. Let the Exec finish his discourse and wait until he opens the floor for your stance or opinion. Once you developed your listening skills, you can easily underpin any positive human relationship – one of your building blocks to success.
2. Obey. Even if you find the direction antithetical or contradictory to your judgment, take heed and follow without disputing. Predominantly, when Execs make decisions or try to solve crises, they don’t refer to books studied page-by-page back in college. They normally take it from their years of experience. You’ll be surprised how their seemingly awkward accord can save an entire organization/negotiation. What’s the shot? Simply say, “Yes Sir”.
3. Have confidence towards. Believe that Executives are brought in such position because they are veritably good at their craft. It is not easy reaching the loftiest position in an organization if one does not elicit the needed skill set – both soft and hard.
4. Know your boss credential and/or back story. Should you not be that convinced with point 3, then do your research. It will help you understand where they are coming from or where to place yourself.
5. Don’t take it personally. Do not retaliate or feel acrimonious when your ideas are rejected or not heard. Often, Senior Execs are looking into a much wider horizon to ensure all aspects are given due consideration. Your ideas may just be fragmentary. However, should you feel like it’s the best solution to the conundrum, come back later bringing out-and-out supporting documents.
6. Respect. For one, he deserves this as your senior. You can respectfully follow orders even if you don’t always agree with them. Second, as they say “respect begets respect” – so let your respect illumines and hope he reciprocates it too.
7. Come back with humor. Humor, not sarcasm, always ease tensions. It makes discussions lighter.
If it still feels like you’re in an office skirmish, just at least ward yourself off with Point 1. Simply because it’s the basic yet a cardinal rule in creating a harmonious relationship whether in your workplace, home or everywhere.
Good luck and hoping you could tame your boss’s dominant personality too!